“The conversation we avoid are often the conversation we need the most” - Bame Bame
Have you ever been in a situation where nothing seemed to be going right? Where everything that could go wrong does? Moments where you questioned God & felt like you have made so many mistakes and you are now living the bad version of the life, you were supposed to have? Well, stay with me for a few minutes. Let’s unpack.
I spent most of my life trying to control everything, pleasing people and trying to maintain this perfect look and afraid to disappoint people around me. so, I was living life based on what I believed people wanted to see. A bitter pill to swallow was my realization that half of the things that happened to me were my fault because I allowed things which I should have put a stop to a long time ago, I taught people how to treat me and I have said no to myself far too long it affected myself esteem at some point. I put other people’s needs before mine and somehow gave them the impression that the bare minimum is good enough for me.
Bad things happen to good people, the sooner you accept that the better your perception of life will be, you will stop expecting life to be fair and you will stop feeling sorry for yourself when bad things happen to you. Not everyone you meet will treat you right, some will use you, betray you and abandon you when you need them the most, the hurt might not be your fault but healing is your responsibility. We sometimes go through life trying to get those who hurt us to tell us why they did it because we believe it will give us closure. Well, sometimes the best thing to closure you’ll ever get is accepting what happened and moving on without explaining your choices to anyone. Just decide you deserve better and then go find better.
Let’s be honest some of the things that happened to you were your fault and you should stop playing the victim all the time and feeling sorry for yourself because that will prevent you from taking responsibility for your life and making the necessary decision to better your life, you can’t learn from a mistake you’re still defending, own up to the part you played in your own suffering, it will help you avoid repeating the same cycles. You are too impatient to wait for what you know you deserve; you don’t take the time to work on your weakness, you don’t listen to constructive feedback because your defensive shield is always up, you don’t have self-discipline and self-control.
Some people are still stuck in the same place because they are expecting help to appear out of nowhere. Guess what, nobody is coming to save you and mostly is because they are busy trying to survive themselves. Some only want to save you if there is something in it for them. You have the power to change your life, only if you decide to. When God tells you to let go of something, just let go. I know the consequences of refusing to let go of the things and people you were supposed to. So, my question to you is “Why are you trying to revive the very thing life asked you to bury?”